That Time of Month

December 6, 2006

We have officially entered that phase of the month I call the “Could I be pregnant?” phase. I think I’ve mentioned before that this started when PJ was only three months old and I was on birth control. Even back then, I started analyzing how I felt, trying to decide whether every vague symptom could be a sign I’m pregnant.

This month it started with having to pee all the time. For about a week now, I’ve been going every two hours during the day and wake up during the night needing to go. This hasn’t been a problem since I was pregnant with PJ. Of course, it could also be a sign of a urinary tract infection. I had one of those when I was pregnant with PJ, too, so that alone won’t get my hopes up about it.

But I noticed around the same time that my emotions were getting out of whack. I had a total freak-out on Saturday about lunch and ended up sobbing. Now I realize how utterly stupid the whole thing was, but at the time, it felt like the world was ending. I’m still tearing up at silly commercials, every TLC baby show, and of course, ER and Gray’s Anatomy. I also cry a lot when I don’t feel good, so maybe I’ve just been a little sick for a while and I haven’t noticed it. Still, combine that with the peeing problem, and it makes me wonder just a little bit.

Then I noticed my boobs were particularly sensitive. That was the very first sign I was pregnant with PJ. M has to be careful when he hugs me, and I’m careful with the way I hold PJ. They feel like they did last time. I’m trying to remind myself that I’m still breastfeeding, about to wean, so of course they’re going to be somewhat sensitive.

And then this morning I got extremely nauseous. I had to go lie down and take a nap to make it go away. I couldn’t function. (Fortunately PJ let me sleep.) I’m excusing this one away with the lack-of-sleep excuse. If all these symptoms continue, though, I’m not going to be able to excuse them away any longer.

I shouldn’t be feeling symptoms yet, if I ovulated when I expected to, even if I conceived right away. That makes it easier to keep from getting my hopes up. I’m not going to test for another couple of weeks, until I’ve given my period a chance to show up first. But if Aunt Flo is late this month, I’ll be testing right away. At that point, I won’t be able to find excuses for the way I feel any longer.