Sooo…tired. All I want to do is sleep. The weekend so far has been crazy, to say the least. What did I tell you? Between possessive in-laws, a toddler who doesn’t want to sleep in his playard at his grandparents’ house (he has to), and still being the only one watching said toddler as he wanders throughout the non-baby-proofed house, I’m exhausted. I haven’t gotten enough sleep and have only had stress added to it in the meantime. At least PJ has turned cuddly to M and me anytime he gets cranky, which is often considering how little sleep he has gotten. And M and I have had more time to snuggle as well, which is certainly helping all aspects of our relationship. And private BIL-BIL chats have bonded the two add-ons to this crazy family as well as calmed some of M’s fears about my little brother. So far it’s been exhausting but worth it. We’ll see how I feel after another early morning and busy day tomorrow.
Now what you’ve all been waiting for. I was trying to find some uber-creative way to give the news, but I’m too tired and lazy to care any more. It’s a boy! He was stubborn about showing off his face for the 3D part of the ultrasound, but he was eager and willing to show us “the goods.” Just like his big brother at that age, he’s not shy and apparently reasonably well-endowed for a fetus. I’m a little early to get good 3D shots and knew that when we signed up for one today, but they still felt bad that we didn’t get the quality of shots that they usually can get, so they offered us a make-up appointment in a few weeks. We’re tentatively set up to try again in about a month, if we still want to make the drive up here then. I’m excited because they totally didn’t have to do that. I wanted to either see a deedle or not and anything else was already icing on the cake.
I’m finding myself a little more disappointed than I thought I’d be. I’m justifiably jealous of all my siblings and friends who will be welcoming their little girls into the world over the next few weeks and months. I probably won’t ever get that chance. I’ll always be that mom with the boys, the one outnumbered at home. I feel a sense of loss at the same time I’m excited to think about the two brothers playing together and all the spoiling the grandsons will get. I think I’m just too overwhelmed right now to sort through the mixture of disappointment and excitement. At least we know for sure one way or another so I can spend the rest of the pregnancy picturing my two boys and not get my hopes up any longer.
By the way, speaking of pictures, I don’t feel like searching for that CD we got from the ultrasound place to upload the pictures to show all of you. I hope you can wait another day or two (probably until Tuesday) to see the specifics. Take my word for it, though, that the “deedle” picture is quite clear this time.