The Weekend’s In-Law Drama

We got to town on Thursday evening, about 7:00-ish or so.  M’s mom was flying into town about 8:30, so we thought we’d spend the evening at his aunt and uncle’s to be there when his mom got there.  It was his mom’s birthday and we couldn’t think of a better present than meeting her newest grandson on her birthday.  My dad was at the hospital with my mom anyway, so we were giving up nothing but an evening alone at their house.  Of course, it was waaaay past PJ’s bedtime, but we were still willing to make the sacrifice to make his mom’s day.

We walked into the aunt and uncle’s house to immediate criticism from his mom, who had managed to beat us there by a few minutes, thus ruining the surprise.  “Why haven’t you started PJ on growth hormones yet?” and “It’s about time I finally get to meet you, BabyN.  I thought I was never going to get to see you.”  Yeah, nice to see you too Mom.  By the time the evening was over, a mere hour and a half later, we were more than ready to go.  And they still wouldn’t let us leave.  It took nearly half an hour to get out the door with BabyN screaming because he was hungry the whole time.  What a way to make us eager to spend more time with you.

The next day, his parents called us asking when we’d be over there on Saturday.  We were in the process of getting my mom settled at home, and we had no idea what our plans would be for the next hour, much less the next day.  And they did not ask whether we might be able to make it over there or whether they might come visit my ailing mother (who sent them a card when his dad was in the hospital); they demanded some of our time instead.  I had a knee-jerk reaction to tell them where to shove it but held my tongue.  We finally compromised by agreeing to visit with them in the morning so that we could spend the afternoon with my mom and our family friends who were coming to spend the day with her.

Again the criticism started immediately.  Barely was a positive word said the whole time we were there.  I guess we got them on a cranky day because I’m not sure I even saw a smile out of either parent, even at PJ’s antics.  There was stress hanging in the air at the house.  Again we couldn’t get out of there fast enough, but we had to stay through lunch, a good two hours at least.  Then after the fun, relaxing time we had there, his dad had the gall to sigh and remark that they might as well head home that night instead of the next day as planned because we probably wouldn’t be back to see them again this trip.  One of these days I’m going to draw blood from biting my tongue.  How I wished I could scream, “The road goes both ways!” 

They are the most selfish and inconsiderate people I’ve ever met.  Even my mom is rooting for us to just have it out with them once and for all, and she’s about as non-confrontational as they come.  But it’s not time for that quite yet.  Of course, if they keep up with these antics while I’m post-partum and sleep-deprived, it’s going to happen whether we’re ready for it or not.


5 Responses to The Weekend’s In-Law Drama

  1. erica says:

    you definately have your hands full with the inlaws.Why does she think PJ needs growth hormones anyways? I probably would have bitten my tongue off by now you are handeling it way better than me.

  2. Chas says:

    Growth hormones? Has your doctor suggested that? If not, why would she even suggest something like that?

    They both sound crazy. I know it’s hard, but biting your tongue might be the right thing to do. If you don’t live near each other then trying to mend the relationship after telling them how you really feel would be rather difficult.

  3. Hoping says:

    ugh. what a pair they are. how stressful for you. just tell them if they want to see you they will have to travel to you, it is easier for them than it is for you. So sorry 😦

  4. Erin says:

    What is it with crappy inlaws??? Yours and mine should get together, they sound the exact same! I feel for you… and you’re definitely better at holding your tongue than I am.

  5. Kristin says:

    To flip the coin on the statement that Chas made :

    “They both sound crazy. I know it’s hard, but biting your tongue might be the right thing to do. If you don’t live near each other then trying to mend the relationship after telling them how you really feel would be rather difficult.”

    It’s a catch 22. From personal experience, yes, it is difficult to mend the relationship after having “the talk”. But, then you have to think about what life is like when you do keep your feelings to yourself. If it’s bad enough that you may lose a body part & your mouth will never be the same, I wouldn’t sacrifice that for the sake of you MIL.

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