Forgive Me

M left a few hours ago for a business trip.  He’ll be gone until late Thursday night.  This is the first time I’ve been left alone with both kids overnight, and I’m scared about it.  I’m going to miss that man like crazy, and it’s getting me down just thinking about it.

I just spent a few minutes reading a lot of your blogs, and I’ve found that I just can’t comment right now, even on those I regularly comment on.  It has to do with this depressed mood.  I can’t celebrate with those of you who just found out good news (Lizzy and Kristin) or are still mourning bad news (Erica).  I can’t give advice or support or anything, as much as I want to.  I’m going to just have to be selfish for a day or two while I cope with my own issues, and then I should be back in full force.

In the meantime, I’m planning a full cleaning of the house.  The idea is that if I’m moving and working, I’m not thinking and letting myself wallow in self-pity.  Already today I’ve reorganized the boys’ room and parts of their playroom, putting away things that we haven’t used or worn in ages.  I did some dusting while I was at it.  Next will be our room.  The only problem is that we keep the place pretty clutter-free, so I’ll have to move to deep cleaning soon and I hate that kind of cleaning.  But it will be worth it if it keeps me sane for the next three days.

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3 Responses to Forgive Me

  1. erica says:

    Its ok…I am alright at the moment.Keep in mind how strong you are.Hopefully the boys do good for you.I hope the next few days go really fast for you….

  2. Patrick says:

    Doing housework to keep yourself busy is a great way to help with the self pity. You can do more though, I believe. Gratitude is the key for me….to always stay grateful and remain positive. Sit down and write out a gratitude list if you have to. I found that I had to create a strict policy with myself to not even allow myself to slip back in to self pity mode even for a moment. Gratitude works. God bless.

  3. erin says:

    Hopefully the time will go by fast for you…staying busy helps 🙂

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