I know I should totally be doing something romantic for Valentine’s Day today, but there’s too much going on that I need to catch everyone up on. This will likely end up long, so I’m sorry. At least I’ll put it in list form so it doesn’t feel as long and rambling.
1. M is out of town again, hopefully for the last time for several months. At least it’s a shorter trip. He left yesterday afternoon and should be home tomorrow evening. It stinks that he’s missing V-Day, but he does special stuff for me so often that it doesn’t matter that he can’t do anything today. I miss him more just because he’s gone than that he’s gone on Valentine’s Day.
2. BabyN has slept through the night two nights in a row now. He’s woken up just as I’ve been about to crash for a feeding and then slept through the rest of the night until 7 or 8 in the morning. I’m hesitant to get my hopes up, but I’m starting to nurse this flicker of hope that this may be our new routine for a while.
3. We may have come up with a solution to get BabyN out of our room without putting him in with PJ and disturbing his sleep. It would mean kind of giving up our guest room, but if guests showed up, we could move him back in our room temporarily. We’re also thinking about making the guest room temporarily permanently BabyN’s room by spending our tax refund on new living room furniture that includes a fold-out couch. When the boys are old enough to use bunk beds, we can shove them in the same room again and reclaim our guest room. I’m excited about the plan, assuming we decide to go through with it.
4. PJ started potty training yesterday. Go check out the other blog if you want to see why yesterday ended up being the chosen day. I’m still not sure I’m ready for this new adventure, even if PJ is.
5. My nephew is continuing to improve, but the drama going on there is insane. Remember how much I’ve whined about my own MIL? Wow, she’s a saint compared to my BIL’s MIL. At their baby shower last weekend, she and my MIL were discussing plans to see the baby over their spring break, when he should be home. Horrible Grandmother (HG) told my MIL that she was taking him for the week and my MIL would not be allowed to see him. “I don’t share my toys well” was the exact quote relayed to us. This will likely be the first week he is home from the hospital, and because of an infection issue in the NICU, only parents are allowed to see the babies anymore. That means that my MIL won’t have had a chance to see her grandbaby since his first week. She’s never held him.
And HG is causing problems in the holding area too. The baby was recently allowed to be held once a day, on a first-come-first-served basis. My SIL got her opportunity a few days ago, and my BIL was to get his the next day. When they got there, though, HG had just left (before the parents-only rule). She’d made a point to get there before anybody else could so that she could hold the baby. She knew the rule and that it would be my BIL’s first chance to hold his child, and went anyway, deliberately trying to hold the baby before his own father could. When they called her after the visit to ask her about it, her response was again, “I told you, I don’t share my toys well.” Yes, even with his own parents.
So that’s put a lot in perspective for me. My MIL is selfish and immature, but she’s not evil. In fact, she’s a saint when you look at how she could have turned out. That doesn’t mean I won’t still share a MIL story from time to time–she’ll still annoy me and make me need to vent–but I think from now on I will at least be able to keep her antics in perspective.
6. I was reading this book the other day (not one you’ve ever heard of, I’m sure) and found myself identifying with one of the characters, even with her obvious flaws. One of the worst was that she chose to be miserable all the time. While I am certainly not that bad, I recognized that I tend to do that sometimes, revel in my unhappiness and misery and pain. It was a cathartic moment for me. I can choose not to show my misery and pain even if I can’t control when I feel it. I am making a point to shove it to the side and focus on the positive whenever possible. Hopefully you will notice a more positive slant to my posts in the near future, an outward show that things are changing on the inside. But please also be patient with me as I slip up from time to time. I know it’s going to be difficult for me to put my long-winded rants to the side; they’re much more fun to write than the moderately happy stuff.