I’m getting pretty good at this single mom stuff. This is the third week in a row that M has been gone for a couple of days during the week, and as much as I dread his leaving, I find that I’m able to cope much better than I thought I would.
Of course, it’s just one night away. Next week he’s gone for most of the week. In the past, I would have considered going to my parents’ place for the week, but that can’t happen this time. PJ would be devastated to miss school for a week, and I simply can’t do that to him just because I’m too much of a pansy to be the solo parent for that long.
So I’m learning how to cook dinner for all three of us, something I normally leave up to M while I keep track of the boys. It may not be anything special, but nobody goes hungry.
I’m learning how to take care of fussy boys who don’t feel very good without being able to pass one off to M. This morning was pure chaos. PJ was crying, probably from this cold or allergies or whatever, and when not every detail of his day goes his way, he just breaks down. BabyN was crying from teething, I guess. He’d been up several times during the night because of it, too. But I didn’t lose it this morning when one or the other was crying every second from the moment BabyN woke me up.
I’m even learning how to take both boys out at the same time, even for frivolous trips. Yesterday was the first time I took both boys shopping alone, and not only did we all survive, but the boys were both good enough that I rewarded them by getting them a new (cheap) toy.
I’m feeling a little like SuperMom today. I know most of the things I’m learning to do are things that most moms do without thinking, but they’re huge for me. I’ve needed this self-confidence. It’s just too bad that it takes me being forced to do them to try them. Still, the confidence I’m finding is motivating me to try other things that I’ve wished I could do for some time.
Who knows what I’ll end up doing next week when M is gone for the whole week…